I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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