Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
