Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
