You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Randomize