You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Randomize
