Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
