All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
My dick has a subreddit
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
