Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
