haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize
