You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
