i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
