end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
We named our party play list daddy issues
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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