I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
