In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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