a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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