Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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