he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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