do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
