Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
