Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
