wanna go halves on a baby?
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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