so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Randomize
