you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
They are going to name an STD after you.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
