Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Randomize
