we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Randomize
