Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Your mouth is God's brothel.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
