Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize