the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
this will be a night to untag.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
