I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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