i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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