guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
