how can u be prego again
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
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