C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Randomize
