This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Shitshow foam night was such a success
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Randomize
