heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
