In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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