when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
