I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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