I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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