That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Randomize
