Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
