And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
Randomize
