You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
