Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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