I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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