I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
