I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
