she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
