I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
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