one might say we're banned from that church
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Randomize
